Disappointments are part of every human reality. In marriage, there is the honeymoon period where each one idealizes the other. Then one day they discover that the other has his/her broken parts, shadow sides, places of darkness, deceit, egoism.... Conflicts arise. The couple then needs help in order to love not the ideal but the other, just as he or she is, with all the beauty and all the brokenness.
Letter to My Brothers and Sisters in L'Arche
(1996) Introduction p. 23